it breaks my heart knowing that i will never receive a blowjob
what the fuck why do so many people think they will never receive a blowjob
Because we have vaginas
(Source: livefastdiemerry, via lame--stain)
me: *does five situps*
me: why don't I have a flat stomach yet?
american horror story: finding a job after college
My first instinct when I see an animal is to say “hello”.
My first instinct when I see a person is to avoid eye contact and hope it goes away.